I’m not exactly sure how to word or describe this feeling, and I’m feeling extremely alone on it but, ever since I got diagnosed earlier this year everything has been feeling harder. I can’t control my anxiety that well, It’s harder to talk to strangers, It’s harder to think properly and manage my emotions. It’s like when I get diagnosed, my whole life restarted and I’m learning everything all over again. And it’s like my brain is still in denial about it because I keep pushing past my limits (wether its something small like over trying to figure out solutions) and wonder why I’m so depressed, anxious and tense.
Labels are useful on a population level and for research, but individually I think they can cause a lot of harm.
A diagnosis is only helpful insomuch as it helps you learn about yourself, but you are not the perfect encapsulation of the average of everyone diagnosed with autism. You are an individual, with a unique mix of traits and abilities, including an ability to grow & develop.
Does autism explain some of who are? Maybe! But does it explain all of who you or all you can become? Hell, no!
Learn about yourself by listening to yourself–there is no better teacher!