Boxed stuffing has been on sale and I cannot stop buying it. I have eaten 10 boxes of stuffing in under 2 weeks. I have 6 more boxes left, and they will probably be gone by, like, next monday. I spice it up with california reaper slivers. I’m sure the 4 tbsp of butter per box is killing me, but I can’t bring myself to care, whether because it’s too good or I’m too depressed.

When the sale first started, there was plenty of chicken, pork, turkey, and cornbread boxes at the store. Then the chicken ran out. Then the pork ran out. And I guess people just don’t want Turkey and Cornbread, and then I thought about it, and you know, turkey on thanksgiving really is just like, the biggest sham.

Chicken is the superior poultry. Which is why it’s readily available nearly everywhere all the time. People like it, its good. Meanwhile, turkey gets the “it’s healthier but doesn’t taste as good,” label. Like, wtf actually wants turkey bacon over pork bacon. Or turkey slices on a sandwhich instead of ham, salami, pepperoni, roast beef, corned beef, or half a dozen other lunch meats.

But once a year, families get together and really just insist and pretend this jumbo sized foul fowl really is just oh so delicious and totally worth the pain in the ass cooking time and work. Then the other 364 days of the year people drop the act and just get a rotisserie chicken when they want a full bird.

It’d be cool if it were true, but I’m pressing X to doubt.

Just add one more step: finally remembering when it’s no longer relevant.

Back when Overwatch was fresh, had a couple randoms I wound up buddying and partnering up with pretty often for a few weeks. But one of them was a really annoying person on mic, who was just very clingy with the other guy. Then other guy wanted to drop clingy guy. Clingy guy freaked. They didn’t split but I eventually just stopped playing. Don’t know how their friendship ultimately turned out.

The only time I’ve ever had someone approach me asking about my autism was from a fellow autist. Twas a good talk.

Nothing much new to say, just reiteration. A big or huge or gigantic map is fine, so long as it’s populated by meaningful content.

Really wish Forspoken had been more populated. It’s a huge world, and combat/abilty wise it’s a great pure-mage action game, which I really really loved about it, that’s not a very common thing. But my god, the world is so empty despite being so big, and most side objectives are just collectothons. There’s some more difficult endgame content, but no real reason to grind up for it.

DOOMSCROLLING.
Doom doom doom doom doom, doom doom do DOOM, DOOOM
doom do-doom, DOOM do-doom doom doooom, doom doom
ooom, do-do-DOOOM!
(6 months later)
Doom doom doo doom doom, DOOMY-DOOMY-DOOM, doom do do
DOOM, Do do DOOM, doomy-doomy-doomy, Doom doom doom
THE END

The fuck. I’ve never heard of this. Haven’t heard anything that interesting in pokemon since years ago back when I was using smogon university to dig into the meta and play on some online simulator where everyone just locked their pokemon at lv50 and could choose all their IV/EV distribution, natures, and move loadouts for the ultimate meta experiance.

After playing the story through a few times, it’s hard to actually stay invested in it anymore, I also did all side quests one run too, and I’m not keen on repeating that. However, 2077 is the only game where I will start it up just to drive around and listen to some music, whether in game or something I pick myself, and then just turn it off. Usuallt for 30-45 minutes. And I played many of the GTAs and all but the first Saints Rows. But only 2077 will I drive around just for the hell of it.

Yes, I go back and replay the game every few years. Its grittiness is definitely a bit silly to me now, but when I was a kid, I was enchanted by it. While the Jensen games did not have the charm of the OG, the first was still decent, and it’s a shame Square Enix drove it into the ground with the second Jensen title.

I both volunteer and am a member at a center that works to vocationally rehabilitate the mentally disabled (ie, help them find work.) It is one of some 300+ clubhouses that follow the Fountain House model. Ironically, I am seeking disability myself and am currently not employed and have been encouraged by my social worker to not follow up on opportunities for the time being. None the less, I spend my time volunteering here 5 days a week because being within a community with other mentally disabled folks makes me not feel so abnormal. Additionally, doing work, even volunteer work, helps curb the inner self-loathing and low self-esteem. To give some perspective, before I joined this community back in May, I thought about suicide daily. When participating at this center, it drops to a few times a week. So yes, it helps.

None the less, the last couple weeks have been rough. For reasons I don’t really know, I’ve been neglecting my meds. I know they work, they really do. But for some reason, I haven’t been able to bring myself to take them consistently.

Additional stressers include dealing with low-level attraction to a couple center staff, one of which there’s some mutual attraction as she’ll actively seek me out just to talk about her day, then steadily go dumb in the head and makes freudian slips as she talks to me until she has to excuse herself. It’s actually kinda cute to watch her fall to pieces. None-the-less she has a BF she lives with and I’ve no interest in even trying to wreck homes or some such, nor am I at a place in my life where I could be a stable person who can contribute towards a relationship that uplifts both people. I am failing at just taking care of myself and am in need of help I simply can’t return. And I get reminded of this each day, and, man, it sucks. It just really sucks.

Additionally, I’m high functioning enough that staff regularly encourage me to go beyond my boundaries with work or school. Because on the outside I seem capable. I do a lot at this center, from kitchen work, plant work (we have a flowershop,) to creating fliers in Canva or helping members/staff type up proposals for this that and the other. But a closer observation of my past school and work life, which they don’t see and I have to repeatedly re-explain to individuals, shows I’m just good at masking for a limited time before completely falling to pieces. And I have fallen so far as to have a genuine psychotic break that resulted in very paranoia inducing Ideas and Delusions of Reference which I was only brought back from due to meds. It’s simultaneously nice to be held at a high esteem and crushing that I cannot live up to what others would expect of me.

It’s better than being all alone I guess, but man, I really get bummed sometimes.

My own noises definitely bug me sometimes, and I generally try and keep quiet. Can’t really recommend, though. It definitely contributes to making one’s self an uninteresting wallflower.

And yet it’s a lot more sensible than trying to reduce a person to a watered downed, cliche sentence. Your statement reminds me of a recent “meme” that got kicked around, which called out the idea of someone going off while angry as “showing their true colors,” and taking issue with how such a statement completely negates all the times a person was good or nice as if it were fake, but that this nasty side in the heat of the moment must really be this person’s one true self. And the meme is right, the concept is bogus. But people love watered down, cliche sentences because they are easy and simple.

Maybe I’m twisted, but I tend to focus too much on how to either fight back or just the really bad decisions the writers have characters make. For example, earlier in October I visited a buddy’s house, and he had one of the Halloween movies on because he’s a big, big horror fan and tis the season. So anyways, some chick has managed to knock out the big bad masked villain on the second floor of a barn by hitting him with a shovel. She then proceeds to try and very clumsily wrap a rope around his neck and push him out the barn to hang him. And the whole time I’m like, (and I comment this to my buddy,) “Why hang the guy? She has a perfectly good shovel right there, slam the blade down onto his neck.” And later, this same gal manages to slam a machete or axe, I don’t remember which, but she slams a bladed weapon into this guy’s skull and he gets knocked out and I’m just like, “Better double tap that shit.”

Suffice to say, I am not a horror fan. I just can’t get into it.

We/they are. So maybe we don’t pay then. I’ve never asked. We just have the premium package, so I assumed we paid.

In my experience, nevermind masking. “Just be yourself,” is just a straight up feel good white lie that society likes to espouse. Society and groups tend to value comformity. It’s right up there with like, The Power of Friendship! When the reality is a lot of friendships don’t survive leaving the school or workspace where they started, or if someone starts a family. It can sometimes take a very serious and concerted effort to try and maintain a friendship.

I use this at a center I volunteer at that works with the mentally disabled. Unsurprisingly, a lot of those people are old. Surprisingly, Canva is simple enough that I’ve been able to train the elderly, of all people, to use the program to make fliers or three-fold pamphlets for themselves. It’s a good program for what it does, and the center pays for a premium subscription, so it’s not something I personally need to worry much about.

Honestly, I’m fine with this in terms of the program’s functionality, as long as Canva does’t fuck with its user interface. It is pretty simple and intuitive, and I’d argue that the UI is quite possibly one of its strongest assets, seconded only by the massive amount of options/elements you can add to your project. And it’s already apparent what AI is mostly used for within the program: making more graphic elements to slap onto your page, and more ready-made templates you can still go in and alter everything in at-will. And honestly, I’m fine with that.

Played Morrowind, Oblivion, and Skyrim as they came out. Love the series. But it also felt like Skyrim lost something (not that it stopped me from sinking a stupid amount of hours into the game or playing it about twice a year.) And you know, my expectations for the next TES aren’t super high. But the thing is, it’s not what Bethesda is going to do with it that really gets me excited. It’s the hope that modding will continue to be heavily supported and what the community will do with the game. I have far more faith in modders than I do in Bethesda. The new TES not being packaged with modding support, to me, that would be the deathknell of TES.